Scorecard

Witham CC v Eight Ash Green Cricket Club Sunday T30 XI on Sun 12 Jul 2015 at 13:00
Eight Ash Green Cricket Club Won by 52 runs

Match report The now formidable EAG Sunday NECL side made the awkwardly lengthy journey to Witham yesterday. Without (dis) abled craptain Stephen Nunn, the team had an uncharacteristic spring in its stride, particularly as their favoured conditions – rain predicted, reduced overs – were on the cards. The rich vain of nepotism now endemic to the club was typically ostensible with one Nunn passing the captain’s wimple to the other son of Barry.

Nunn junior however started as it turned out he went on: gingerly and poorly, deigning not to turn up in time for the toss. The team took this as clear evidence that the motor in his mode of transport - Luke Keyboard’s car has given up the ghost under the terrific loads it has to consistently forbear. One of the team’s senior vice captains (which included everyone except Matt “VesuviArse” Parker) in Andrew Woodhouse tossed in lieu, won and took the no brainer decision of batting much to the chagrin of the opposition captain whose appearances indicated promising tossing ability.

As the team were organising themselves to bat, the heavens opened at medium throttle prompting Witham to pull the covers on and play into EAG’s hands by reducing the overs to 25 a side to reflect the impending forecast.

Now back from expensive boarding school and roofing college respectively, James Parker and Jack Smith were sent in against the new ball by a hasty Richard Nunn, son of Barry. Up against mediocre bowling at best, the two made a great start, racking up close to 100 off the first 8 odd overs miraculously without much slogging at all, just patient and technically sound batting and running.

James was the first of the two to fall. A quicker ball from one of their two useful finger spinners. (a skill with absentee captain Steve uses to his advantage in divers fields) right and left arm respectively, pushed him back to be caught behind. A very useful 46 set the team up excellently. Predictably, the next man in was the man with the lucozade (original) lid – the arrogant captain for the day. Clearly thinking that his other membership at Kelvedon CC entitled him to a high batting position, Dick Cunn brazenly marched to the crease, faced a ball, played a stroke worthy of a blind man with cerebral palsy, got caught and walked back – shocking.

Next in was Luke Fatboard who unsurprisingly could be heard guffawing at the crease just as loudly as he could in the pavilion by spectators; as Jack soon departed, caught at long off, Luke was joined by grammar school co-educate Josh Lennard-Jones. Luke seemed to have realised his recent run of low scores was principally down to reckless and stroke-play devoid of concern for the team’s total and played patiently and effectively alongside Lennard-Jones.

The latter was not to last long however, attempting to pull a glacially slow delivery from the left armer which somehow managed to knock his OFF stump out o’ t’ ground as J L-J found himself pirouetting like a spinning top. The team remained confident though, now onto 100 plus off 10 and with JP Purser on his way to the crease to join Sky-High-BMI – a pair more than capable of rapid scoring.

JP continued his unfortunate run, trapped on the crease LBW by a quicker one from the right arm fingerer. Richard Nunn sent in Woodhouse to try to continue to score quickly in the quest for 200 from the 25 overs allotted.

Woodhouse belted the first two balls faced from the new spinner on for 4 and 6 respectively, acting as he meant to go on. This stream of runs was continued by Keebster, who interspersed boundaries with effective running between the wickets as the total continued to aggrade in spite of generally good bowling from the left armer.

Woodhouse rapidly accelerated past Keyboard, sailing into the late 20s and 30s, 40s and oh, yes into his debut 50 for the green in the last over in spite of the departure of Keeble and Norris in the interrim. Hitting a colossal six off the last ball, he finishe on 57 not out.

The Green, pleased with their efforts both to finish on 197 for 8 and deprive Matt Parker of a bat. A rather poor tea ensued as both sides watched Djokovic begin to wrap Federer in his web of raw aggression.

Roll on the Green’s demonic bowling attack that “usurped” Gt. Horkesley & Lexden a fortnight beforehand – all four prongs of which were back in action on this day. Nunn opened with Matt Parker, both of who bowled with mixed results and expectedly were put away for a few boundaries after an economical first 3. It was a quiet day for Parker M who left Witham without dismissals.

Richard picked up the first wicket, leaving the holy grail behind of off and leg stump and a middle stump flailing through the air. Parker, M was replaced by Parker J who look initially erratic but soon found his stride, picking up two wickets. Despite drops from Jack “Black” Smith and Josh L-J, Woodhouse also picked up a wicket from a misplaced late cut straight into the hands of R Nunn at gulley.

Some good quality fielding all round punctuated by extreme cowardice and indolence from Matt Parker when fielding at short cover ensured runs were scarce for the opposition. Another game another pair of binned pants eh Matt – just don’t take up the jock-strap now… The bowling performance made short work of the tail, Jack finishing several off – including Jamie Murray who took a non-bouncer to the adams apple. The opposition innings then ended with an excellent flopping catch onto the wicket from Parker J at silly point – who else could we put there really.

Pints were quaffed in the bar afterwards at the expense of a jubilant Woodhouse who had finally made it past 50 runs. The team then headed back to the green to shovel large amounts of curry into their faces courtesy of the resurgent motor of Luke Keyboard.
Well done to everybody that played and thanks very much to Richard’s friend Olllie who made up the 11.

Without doubt, however, the team’s minds were left overcast by the looming threat of promotion next year. In this way, Steve has decided to play with one fewer player each week until we are on a par with opposition.

AW

Eight Ash Green Cricket Club Sunday T30 XI Batting
Player Name RunsMB4s6sSRCtStRo
extras
TOTAL :
1nb 3w 7b 4lb 
for 9 wickets
15
197		        
James Parker ct b Brook 44 1
Jack Smith b b Brook 35 2
Richard Nunn ct b Brook 0 1
Joshua Lennard-Jones b b Cooper 3
Luke Keeble ct Ct Glynn b Waring 28
Jonathan Purser lbw b Brook 0
Jamie Murray ct b Crown 8
Andrew Woodhouse Not Out  57 5
Matt Norris ct Glynn b Waring 5 1
A.N. Other not out Oli Chapman 1 1
Matt Parker  

Witham CC Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
M Headly3.002500.008.33
M Glynn4.003500.008.75
S Brook5.022337.674.60
S Cooper5.0011111.002.20
W Crown3.0041141.0013.67
S Bendall3.001700.005.67
A Waring2.0025212.5012.50

Witham CC Batting
Player name RMB4s6sSR
extras
TOTAL :
2nb 7w 9b 1lb 
for 10 wickets
19
145 (22.0 overs)		     
M Godwin ct Ct Nunn b Woodhouse 31
S Cooper b b Nunn 1
M Headly ct Ct J Smith b J Parker 27
T Garwood b b J Parker 1
J Sambrook ct Ct M Norris b Nunn 37
M Glynn ct Ct J Smith b Norris 24
C Barber b b J Smith 0
T Hayes b b J Smith 6
J Brown run out O Chapman 0
A Waring  
S Bendall ct J Parker b J Smith 0

Eight Ash Green Cricket Club Sunday T30 XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Matt Parker3.002000.006.67
Richard Nunn5.0032216.006.40
James Parker5.0036218.007.20
Andrew Woodhouse4.0021121.005.25
Matt Norris2.0011111.005.50
Jack Smith3.411133.673.00