It's final, England are pretty much useless at sports they invent, after losing to an average Bangladesh side this morning questions are going to be asked about the squad and the coach. 

In the event of the ECB stumbling on this page we have prepared an England XI of Green players and what they can add to the team:

Coach: Stephen Nunn- with his coaching qualifications and video analysis at the nets surely makes him the best coach for the job.

1. Ollie Lovejoy- ( Recently defected to South Africa) Cutting the ball more than the Tories cutting public services, and sweeping more than Richard Parker sweeping the clubhouse on a match morning. Makes him the attacking number one that England need.

2. Matt Parker- 43 against Clacton, is there really more that could be said? If he can get that against Clacton then Australia shall have no chance. ( he is batting number 2 because we have enough bowlers)

3. Ollie Stovellieo- Typical number 3, poke the ball about then slog, then get tired, then get out. A spinner to the bowling attack all he needs is the Visa from another country and a beard then you have Moeen.

4. Joe (Very) Young- (WC) Smashing ability in the nets against the spinners, shows good confidence till he misses a few then gets angry, then gets out to Nick. Great sledger of the game as demonstrated against Mersea in that emphatic win.

5. Andrew Woodhouse- New addition to the green with a new addition to his kit bag, Andrew is a wildcard in the selection as after a couple of weeks ago he got out to a full toss slower ball from Alex Hammond. However, with the new Spartan bat kindly donated by the Association of Blind Cricketers.

6. Luke Keyboard- (C) Luke is a one man crowd, tell him an appalling joke you'll get a laugh from him, which is what makes him a great captain, the ability to laugh at his own performances. The England Captain has a curse luckily Luke has already been cursed with below average bowling and poor batting which makes him perfect for the job. After a game he can always relax by sitting on the toilet with his top off singing. 

7. Nick (Insert Surname Here)- With his patient bowling technique we can see him taking crucial wickets this season. His aggressive batting sees him hitting 50's off of Matt Parker's bowling.

8. Jens Wair- A defector from the european country Yugoslavia. The spinner gets immense whip from his 'moon balls' however is yet to take any wickets in the nets, quick between the wickets makes him ideal for batting number 8.

9. Mark Goodall- the Ginger Ninja, immense pace bowling and aggressive direct batting makes him a contender for higher up the order, however his aggression can get the better of him which is why its a safe bet to keep him at 9. He is however liable to sledging from the opposition due to the fact he supports Aston Villa.

10. Jack Smith- When he hasn't turned up to the club with a hangover he pulls a rather good performance out of his suspiciously large cricket bag. With slogging powers and expert bouncers makes him a force to be reckoned with.

11. Dominic (THE MAN) Purser- Last but definitely not least is the One Man Army that is the Purser, if the ICC allowed a team of just one player we would enter Dom, however after contacting him in every way possible he is yet to receive the selection letter. 

So there you go ECB the new England Cricket XI made up of a few EAGCC players.