Scorecard

Halstead CC v Eight Ash Green Cricket Club North Essex 1st XI (Sunday) on Sun 16 Sep 2018 at 12:30
Eight Ash Green Cricket Club Lost

Match report Here you go, the match report. Sorry if it doesn't work but difficult to publish in this format. If you are on Facebook and can't read this well follow the link and read it on the website. Written by Scott Chegg

Is it Christmas? A birthday? A new player to the green?
Why are the players so jubilant, so excited, so keen?
Halstead Cricket Club the hosts, the place to convene,
Why for it’s the last cricket match of 2018!!!
Steven Nunn the skipper, the leader, the boss,
His first duty, the first bridge to cross,
Is an important one, for it cannot be a loss,
For Christ sake Steven win the bloody toss!!
Hooray! The first win is ours and we decide to bat,
Some quick decisions from the skip, no need for a spat,
For there’s one person who can talk the talk and give the chat,
“I’m the best person for the job skip.” Matt Parker to open, soon to be laughed at.
By his side, a rather hungover, slow moving Richard Nunn the great,
Swaying at the crease he was a hell of a state,
But who am I to judge, to comment, to dictate,
As he was scoring runs freely, boundaries came at such rate.
Not the same could be said about Matt Parker may I remind,
Comments from the crowd such as “is that man ok, is that man blind?”
For he played a drive, snicked off and was caught behind,
1 run, a long walk back as he moaned and whined.
James Parker in next, he cannot repeat his twin’s blunder,
For the 5th ball crashed to boundary, it sounding like thunder,
For he realised the run rate was slow and dull, we were well under,
Working Richard hard between the wickets despite his near chunder.
Nunn and Porky running the place another boundary again,
The scorers ink running out of their pen,
For the two were in good nick, really true batsmen,
A score unheard of on Sunday, 70 off 10!!





But someone just had to go and ruin the show,
Bowled cleanly by King, it kept a bit low,
75 runs for Nunn he had a hell a of a go,
Soon to be learnt it was such a big blow.
Duncan Wyatt stepped up to the crease and took his stance,
38 runs on Saturday, maybe this is his chance,
Body still, hands low, his face in a trance,
His calls could be heard from the East of France!
Porky taps a single, yes is the shout!
Duncan runs hard, he leaps like a trout,
A whizz of the ball and a hell of a clout,
Duncan’s just short, he’s been given out!
Wyatt sent in his way for 3 runs, another low score,
Runs were harder to get, it was becoming a chore,
Frustration from Porky as he kicks the floor,
The same time Duncan slams open the changing room door.
What came next you could call a collapse,
A misery, poor performance or rubbish perhaps,
Was not great batting from the lower order chaps,
6 wickets with just 6 overs elapsed!
Porky gone! Out with a courageous 78,
Played for the spin but bowled through the gate,
Plummer the same, the spin he couldn’t negate,
Told from the start, “you need to play straight!”
Plummer, Clayson, Murphy, Wyatt Jnr all got ducks,
It was like they were batting without any fu……. cares
The fact we were 180 for 9 was more of the crux,
Who was going to step up and get runs, who dares?





The skipper was noble and entered in last,
The team hoping, praying for a Stevie Nunn blast,
Ones we have seen way back in the past,
To score runs quickly, to score runs fast.
A 4, a 2 another 4 the Capt. was on a role,
The bowlers tried hard, they had no-where to bowl,
Maybe the skipper can get us out of this hole,
At this rate 250 would be an easy stroll.
Alas, Will Spicer with 10 overs remaining,
Was given a delivery he thought needed caning,
Fast hands, swinging hard like we’ve seen during training,
To miss the ball and hit the stumps, my god it was draining.
And that was us bowled out for a measly 197,
Could’ve been 297 if only we had Bevin,
Told us he went back home but he’s secretly in Devon,
Playing cricket for another team, that man is in Heaven.
Ethan Wyatt the youngster to open the bowling,
Running in hard that boy wasn’t strolling,
His bowling was clever, on the spot and controlling,
Unfortunately the batsmen got the scoreboard rolling.
Spicer at the other end hoping to bowl some spin,
Foot holes all around he needed to land them in,
Except a few were bowled low and few on the chin,
Let’s just say the rubbish was put in the bin!
Ethan to take the first wicket, he was off the rails!
A slower, looping delivery which soars and sails,
Deceiving the batsmen and removing his bails,
Bevin would be proud, he’s actually secretly in Wales!





Enough about Bevin and on with the game,
I just really miss that man, life isn’t the same!
Every player fielding well there was no one to blame,
Connor Murphy was outstanding, he brought the team no shame.
He was sliding to the left and diving to the right,
A true athlete, to watch him was a delight,
Standing firm and stopping balls in mid-flight,
Hit hard off of Matt Parker’s bowling which was absolute shi…pants.
A slightly delirious Richard Nunn was given the old ball,
Marking out his run up I’m surprised he didn’t crawl,
As he was still feeling iffy after his midnight McDonalds brawl,
I think he was done, I think he hit the wall.
But miraculously he managed to take himself a wicket,
A well flighted delivery outside off stump was the ticket,
The batsman tried hard but he just couldn’t pick it,
Nunn was starting to enjoy this adventurous game of Sunday cricket!
Halstead’s batsmen to win them the game was their number 3,
The opening bowler, a thin bloke maybe slightly lanky,
Caressed the ball, timed it well and was on a hitting spree,
Quickly finding himself acknowledging the crowd and raising his bat for his century.
Fair play to him he played his shots well,
Some would say a slightly taller Ian Bell,
Every opening bowler’s idea of hell,
Dispatching each and every one of them throughout their spell.
One last wicket taken from our very own James Plummer you should know,
An interesting action, lofty leg spinners he would throw,
Often coming down from orbit laced heavily with snow,
Too tempting for Halstead’s top batsmen, caught on the boundary, off he would go.





Plummer takes his first ever kill in the Sunday League,
With top class bowling like that I know it’s hard to believe,
Effortless, smooth, he never fatigues,
Just as beautiful as the wampumpeag.
Those of you who are uneducated and knowledge impedes,
It is upsetting you don’t know this word, for you my heart bleeds,
Wampumpeag is American Indian for a necklace made of shell beads,
It was hard to find another word which rhymed with leagues.
The batsman was gutted he felt like a mug,
Plummer giving him a send-off fit for a thug,
Spicer running over giving his pal a great hug,
Knowing shortly they’ll be in the bar sharing a jug.
A jug of J2O of course we don’t condone underage drinking,
El Presidente behind the bar at the club a wide smirk and suggestively winking,
We can’t have the youth section going home stinking,
What on earth would their poor parents ever be thinking!
Alas back to the game for the total has been got,
The 27th over, a 4 ball right in the slot,
In all fairness to the batsman it was one hell of a shot,
But now we hang up our cricket kit to rot.
As the season is now over and we can head to the bar,
The team has done well, some say well above par,
Some stand out performances, you know who you are,
And the youth section today were the best by far.
Our final game of the season and the result didn’t go our way,
But we leave with our heads held high to return another day,
And we hang up our cricket boots and put our bats away,
Clear our heads and put our cricket thoughts at bay.
Believe it or not but Bevin is actually in Aberdeen,
Sat at the bar with his cap raising his pint of Greene,
For a good season and a good season it has been,
For our courageous boys in white at Eight Ash Green.

Eight Ash Green Cricket Club North Essex 1st XI (Sunday) Batting
Player Name RunsMB4s6sSRCtStRo
extras
TOTAL :
1nb 5w 5lb 
for 10 wickets
11
197		        
Richard Nunn b J. King 75
Matt Parker ct b J. Ruthven 1
James Parker b J.King 78
Duncan Wyatt run out Unknown 3
James Plummer b C. Hansey 0
Will Spicer b M. Johnson 11
Alex Hammond b C. Hansey 8
Fraser Clayson ct C. Roper b C. Hansey 0
Connor Murphy b C. Hansey 0
Ethan Wyatt b C. Hansey 0
Steve Nunn Not Out  10

Halstead CC Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
J. Ruthven6.0045145.007.50
M. Whymark4.003300.008.25
J. Morris3.002700.009.00
C. Hansey8.004158.205.13
J. King 8.0042221.005.25
M. Johnson 1.10414.003.43

Halstead CC Batting
Player name RMB4s6sSR
extras
TOTAL :
5w 9b 1lb 
for 3 wickets
15
198 (28.5 overs)		     
G. Raviendran b E. Wyatt 9
A. Morris b R. Nunn 16
J. Ruthven ct R. Nunn b J. Plummer 108
S. Walter Not Out  40
C. Mallett Not Out  10
   
   
   
   
   
   

Eight Ash Green Cricket Club North Essex 1st XI (Sunday) Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Ethan Wyatt5.5043143.007.37
Will Spicer5.002200.004.40
Richard Nunn4.0025125.006.25
Matt Parker4.002600.006.50
James Plummer5.0043143.008.60
Steve Nunn4.002700.006.75
Connor Murphy1.00200.002.00